[chrysostom]

Perpetuating the social myth means you're part of the problem and not part of the solution (unless you're not bothered by the stereotype that women should be pampered in a "courtship" as they are the fairer sex - but that's linked with several other stereotypes which are derogatory to women).

I can't read the article as it's blocked by work's adult filter. Thanks for that

[Nicola_Red]

Perpetuating the social myth means you're part of the problem and not part of the solution (unless you're not bothered by the stereotype that women should be pampered in a courtship as they are the fairer sex - but that's linked with several other stereotypes which are derogatory to women).

I can't read the article as it's blocked by work's adult filter. Thanks for that

Bugger. Weirdly our filter doesn't block that article - it does lots of that writer's other stuff. I shall quote:

If two adults want to enter into a financial agreement on the level of one night, one year, or a lifetime together, what's so wrong with that?

There seems to be this overriding mentality that leveraging your looks and sexuality for financial gain is somehow the "easy way out." I dare say that whosoever thinks that has never been sweated all over by a 70-year-old man or pretended to just love spending time with a pompous douchebag on a free trip to Paris. Sex work is hard work.

The whole time I dabbled in sex work, I was acutely aware that I was holding a ticket of youth and relative good looks and sexual availability, and that I had a limited time to try to cash in my chips, to trade them for access to a more lucrative life.

In the end, I wasn’t willing to. I didn't value the beautiful life as much as I did enjoying it with a true companion. But many women feel differently, and I don’t blame them for choosing to trade independence for security, for the Amex with their name on it and the rent-free apartment. I don’t begrudge them their big payday.

If we, as women, are going to be objectified and exploited at the first sprouting seeds of puberty, why not beat the world to the punch and "exploit" ourselves, for our own benefit? In a perfect world, maybe, people's bodies would not be available for sale or rent, but I don't live there. Frankly I find it a comfort to know that I'm literally sitting on a plan B should my fortunes take a turn for the worse.

And I don't believe anyone has to subvert their individual needs to some ideal of sexual equality that won't be seen in their lifetimes. F*** that, get yours.

So I say, Marry rich if you want to. Put your ass in Playboy, hit the pole, accept gifts from an investment banker, take the free vacation, let him pay your rent, be a professional mistress, buy everything frivolous and excessive and necessary that you want. Hustle, baby.

[chrysostom]

But that attitude weakens the efforts of those who strive for gender equality, based on the notion that women should exploit an imperfect society by helping strengthen the perceptions that keep society imperfect (the main ones being that women should be rewarded for sex and housework, and also the idea that women aren't capable of holding their own financially).

I'm fine with the idea of chivalry, but then again I'm not a feminist.

[Nicola_Red]

Mm. Interesting. I do see your points, but I'm not sure if it's suggesting that women aren't capable of holding their own financially - just that they can choose not to if they don't want to. Plus, to what extent is sex work not holding your own financially? Is it less so than me sitting here selling tickets to pay my rent?

[chrysostom]

The fact that it's socially acceptable (to a majority) for women to have the choice to not pay their way in social situations means that there is a financial disparity between men and women that stems from men being the sole earners and women being relegated to less important, and less financially rewarding jobs.

In my opinion, to enforce this point of view, is also to prevent society seeing women as able to pay their way - due to an imbalance in finance, and a perceived imbalance in skillsets/qualifications.

There's nothing wrong with sex work, but because escorting is a primarily female industry and heavily associated with pimping, trafficking and poverty - it would be fair to say that men's views on women aren't helped by the sex industry, given that a large proportion of prostitutes who the average non-executive 'punter' will come across (excuse the pun) will probably be a girl who's been trafficked into the country and ushered into work which she'd probably rather not do (that's not to say that all women in escorting are like that - but in sheer numbers, the women trafficked into the country are quite a proportion).

Beyond the simple 'objectification of the female body' argument, it also begins to cheapen the idea of sex - turning it into just another service which is provided by women for men, which isn't an issue for some people.

You provide a service by selling tickets - but to some, the idea that sex could be traded in a similar way is objectionable because of their perception that sex & intimacy should be symbiotic (based on the viewpoint that sex with someone who is paying you for it will lack intimacy), and to charge for it doesn't represent an achievement in the working world - but an abandonment of sex as a device for intimacy or pleasure, and simply using a very base skillset that everyone is born with - but some choose not to exploit financially, similar to the skills required for drug dealing or organised crime.

It all comes down to personal morality, etc. I have no idea where the point of my argument is anymore.

[Yudster]

You're not getting a lot done in the office today are you Chrysostom?

[chrysostom]

Look! A man gets shot in the head with a nailgun, pulls it out an carries on while the reporter turns into a fish!

http://m.youtube.com/#/watch?desktop_ur ... Tcow&gl=GB

In answer to your question, no. Today has not been productive.

At least my first rambling post was relevant to my work.

[Nicola_Red]

You provide a service by selling tickets - but to some, the idea that sex could be traded in a similar way is objectionable because of their perception that sex & intimacy should be symbiotic (based on the viewpoint that sex with someone who is paying you for it will lack intimacy), and to charge for it doesn't represent an achievement in the working world - but an abandonment of sex as a device for intimacy or pleasure, and simply using a very base skillset that everyone is born with.

I think this is bollocks. And I know you're not saying that you believe it, by the way. If a person wants sex to be a transaction rather than an expression of emotion, then I say that's their right. Other people have no business dictating how women should use their bodies. And that would go equally for men, but it's usually women who are on the receiving end of that attitude.

[chrysostom]

You can't judge people by what they do with their bodies in the same way you can't judge people for thinking sex should be something that shouldn't be cheapened to a financial transaction.

Everybody judges everyone's actions based on their own values and codes.

[Nicola_Red]

No, I wouldn't judge anyone for choosing to only have sex with people they love. But people (again, mainly women here) are judged all the time for making the opposite choice. I had the misfortune to catch a bit of an episode of Jeremy Kyle the other day, and he was yelling at a women "WHAT ARE YOU DOING SLEEPING WITH 74 MEN?" Er, cos it's her vagina? Grr.

[SAV1OUR]

All the papers taking the mickey out of a speech impediment our new England manager posesses.

Jonathan Woss must be delighted.

[MK Chris]

He doesn't have a Ross style rhotacism though - someone on Twitter pointed out it's more Harry H Corbett, which I think is accurate.

[Nicola_Red]

rhotacism

That's a great word. Rho-ta-cism.

[Yudster]

And the irony of it is that people who HAVE it can't SAY it...

[Dexy]

It's like rain on your wedding day.

[dimtimjim]

Or being flooded in during a drought...

[MK Chris]

And the irony of it is that people who HAVE it can't SAY it...

And you are one of those.

[Yudster]

I'm not too bad...!

[MadTheEddos]

Hearing "Stay" by Shakespears Sister being played by Dev. Love that song!
Sooo long since I've heard it played anywhere. And Siobhan Fahey is smoking hot in the video for it. Yum.

[Nicola_Red]

PPI cheque finally in the bank! It'll take a dog's age to clear, but still, I'm getting there.

[MK Chris]

Five working days, surely?

[dimtimjim]

3 days with my bank.... which is about the only good feature of their service.

[Nicola_Red]

I dunno how long it'll be, I haven't paid in a cheque for years.

[dimtimjim]

Either way, you'll be 'spending' next week, sometime. Not long now.

[Nicola_Red]

I know! Gonna take myself off for a little trip to London, see some galleries, maybe some theatre...very exciting.