Transcripts of Dave's Tedious Links
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By Nicola_Red
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Today's Tedious Link:

Supergrass: Richard III

Today's Transcript:

A rendezvous is what you'd have to arrange if you were meeting up with somebody in France. France is where they hold the Tour de France, which has been won several times by Lance Armstrong, who I think is the other half of Sheryl Crow. A crow is a large black bird that you might see in a field. 'Field of Dreams' is a baseball film starring Kevin Costner, who also starred in 'Robin Hood Prince of Thieves'. 'Thieves' rhymes with 'leaves', which are what you'd find in a salad. Salad is often eaten in summer, in contrast with soup which is more of a winter thing. Winter is the best time of the year for going skiing, which is something you do in the mountains. Mountains can be dangerous, especially in bad weather. If you were stranded on a mountain you'd probably have to be rescued by a St Bernard, who'd have brandy and blankets. Blankets are also what poor people relied on before the invention of central heating, and while those people huddled together in their slums the rich kings and queens lived in castles, like during the reign of Richard III, which links to Supergrass and 'Richard III'.

Flaws:

Lance Armstrong and Sheryl Crow are no longer together, and St Bernards apparently no longer carry brandy round their necks, as alcohol can be dangerous in cases of shock and hypothermia.

Tedious Facts:

Released - April 1997

Highest UK Chart Position - #2
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By Nicola_Red
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Today's Tedious Link:

Robbie Williams: Lazy Days

Today's Transcript:

Richard III ruled either before or after Henry VIII. Henry VIII had loads of wives, including one called Catherine of Aragon, whose family probably originally came from Spain. Spain is also where Montserrat Cabaille is from, who duetted on 'Barcelona' with Freddie Mercury. Freddie Mercury was born in Zanzibar, which is an island off the coast of Africa. 'Africa' was a hit for Toto. The Inter-toto is a minor European Cup competition. If you add a 'K' onto the front of the word 'cup' and then reverse all the letters you get 'puck', which is the metal thing used in ice hockey. Ice hockey is played on a rink. If you add the letter 'D' to the beginning of rink' you get 'drink', which is something Robbie Williams used to do but doesn't now, which links to Robbie Williams and 'Lazy Days'.

Flaws:

A couple of issues today. Richard III ruled before Henry VIII, but not directly before, Richard was in fact succeeded by Henry VII; and ice hockey pucks are not made of metal, but a rubber-plastic composite.

Tedious Facts:

Released - July 1997

Highest UK Chart Position - #8
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By Nicola_Red
#446789
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Today's Tedious Link:

Incognito feat Jocelyn Brown: Always There

Today's Transcript:

'Lazy Days' was taken from Robbie's debut album 'Life Thru A Lens'. Lens is a town in France whose football team used to be managed by Gerard Houllier, who's now manager of Lyon. 'Leon' is a film starring Gary Oldman, who is the brother of Laila Morse, who plays Mo in 'Eastenders'. Laila Morse shares the same surname as Inspector Morse, who had an assistant called Lewis who was played by Kevin Whateley, who was also in 'Auf Wiedersehn Pet' with Jimmy Nail. Jimmy Nail starred in 'Spender' and sung about crocodile shoes. Crocodile shoes are the sort of thing you might expect somebody to wear with a cowboy hat. Hats are often combined with dark glasses in the world of detectives, who often work undercover. The Italian word for 'undercover' is 'incognito', which links to Incognito and 'Always There'.

Flaws:

Watertight today.

Tedious Facts:

Released - June 1991

Highest UK Chart Position - #6
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By Nicola_Red
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Today's Tedious Link:

Take That: Never Forget

Today's Transcript:

The main man behind Incognito is called Bluey, which is also a slang term for a specialist video that you might get on import from Sweden. Sweden is a major producer of meatballs, which are often good served with spaghetti. Spaghetti is cooked by boiling, and in that respect shares something in common with eggs. Eggs are produced by chickens, which go 'cluck'. The word 'cluck' rhymes with 'buck', as in 'Uncle Buck', which was a film starring John Candy. Candy is the American term for sweets and chocolate. 'Sweet Like Chocolate' was a hit for Shanks & Bigfoot. 'Shanks' rhymes with 'planks', which is what pirates walk when they're naughty. 'Naughty Girl' was a hit for Holly Valance, who used to be in 'Neighbours', a bit like Kylie Minogue. Kylie recorded a duet with Robbie Williams who used to be in Take That, which links to Take That and 'Never Forget'.

Flaws:

Seamless link.

Tedious Facts:

Released - August 1995

Highest UK Chart Position - #1

This Link was read by friend of the show Longman in Dave's absence.

Listen to the Link:

http://chrismoyles.net/soundvault/soundvault.php?fileid=1467
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By Nicola_Red
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Today's Tedious Link:

The Police: Every Breath You Take

Today's Transcript:

Never forgetting is a characteristic that you'd associate with an elephant. Elephants are found in Africa and India. Indian culture provided the inspiration for much of the music of Kula Shaker, whose debut album was called 'K'. K in alphabetical terms is number 11. Eleven in the world of time is just one hour short of midday or midnight. 'Midnight At The Oasis' was a hit for the Brand New Heavies, who I once saw at the Royal Albert Hall. Hall and Oates had a big hit with 'Maneater'. 'Maneater' is also the title of a record by Nelly Furtado. Nelly Furtado is from Canada, which gets cold in the winter, a bit like Scotland, where today people will be getting their exam results at school. School is where you find teachers, and a teacher is what Sting was before he formed The Police, which links to The Police and 'Every Breath You Take'.

Flaws:

Seamless link.

Tedious Facts:

Released - May 1983

Highest UK Chart Position - #1
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By Nicola_Red
#446792
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Today's Tedious Link:

Alien Ant Farm: Smooth Criminal

Today's Transcript:

The drummer in The Police was Stewart Copeland, who was recently a judge on 'Just The Two Of Us'. 'Just The Two Of Us' was covered in 1998 by Will Smith. Will Smith starred as the Fresh Prince of Bel Air, which is a posh district of Los Angeles. Los Angeles means 'city of angels'. 'Angels' was beaten to the no1 in 1997 by the Spice Girls. The Spice Girls were managed by Simon Fuller, who shares one name in common with Paul Simon, who sang about Gracelands. Graceland is the mansion owned by Elvis Presley. Elvis Presley's widow Priscilla starred in 'Naked Gun' alongside OJ Simpson. OJ Simpson was found innocent in the legal case which was beamed by satellite all over the world, and in that respect shares something in common with Michael Jackson. Michael Jackson had a hit with 'Smooth Criminal' which was covered by Alien Ant Farm, which links to Alien Ant Farm and 'Smooth Criminal'.

Flaws:

Nothing to report.

Tedious Facts:

Released - April 1997

Highest UK Chart Position - #4
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By Nicola_Red
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Today's Tedious Link:

The Chemical Brothers feat Noel Gallagher: Setting Sun

Today's Transcript:

Alien Ant Farm's follow up to 'Smooth Criminal' was called 'Movies'. Movies are what you'd watch at the cinema in the dark. 'Dark Side Of The Moon' was a classic album by Pink Floyd. Floyd, first name Keith, is a chef who I once sat next to in a pub in Ireland. Ireland is where Shane Lynch might be, having returned from Love Island. 'Love Island' is hosted by Patrick Kielty and Fearne Cotton. Cotton is something you might find in a sewing box, along with needles. The Needles are a collection of rocks off the coast of the Isle of Wight. White is the surname which links soul legend Barry with snooker player Jimmy, while Jimmy is the first name that links comedians Cricket and Tarbuck. Jimmy Tarbuck is the father of Liza, who played Linda Green. Green is the colour you'd associate with grass and frogs. Frogs often come out in the evening, around the setting sun time, which links to The Chemical Brothers and 'Setting Sun'.

Flaws:

Frogs aren't always green, but otherwise seamless.

Tedious Facts:

Released - October 1996

Highest UK Chart Position - #1
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By Nicola_Red
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Today's Tedious Link:

Strike: U Sure Do

Today's Transcript:

The Chemical Brothers consist of two blokes called Tom and Ed, one of whom has long hair and the other has short hair. If you have long hair but want short hair, you need to go to the barbers'. Barber, first name Glynis, played Makepeace in the show 'Dempsey and Makepeace', and her real name is Glynis Van Der Riet because she was born in South Africa, a bit like Rika van den Haas in 'Lethal Weapon II', who was played by Patsy Kensit. Patsy Kensit used to be in 'Emmerdale', which features a pub called the Woolpack, which is where you'd find the Woolpackers. The Woolpackers had a hit with 'Hillbilly Rock, Hillbilly Roll'. A roll of a different type is what you'd eat with soup. Soup can be made out of all sorts of things, such as chicken or mushrooms. Mushrooms can be dangerous and should be eaten with caution when out in the wild, because they can be poisonous, like snakes. Snakes like to lay in the grass, they sure do, and then jump out and strike, which links to Strike and 'U Sure Do'.

Flaws:

Patsy Kensit is still in 'Emmerdale', and it's toadstools, not mushrooms, that are poisonous.

Tedious Facts:

Released - April 1997

Highest UK Chart Position - #4
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By Nicola_Red
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Today's Tedious Link:

Blur: Country House

Today's Transcript:

Strike is a word associated with a chord, which is something you might play on a guitar. A guitar is something that you wouldn't find at a Keane concert, who Scott gave away tickets to see in concert in Dublin. Dublin is the capital of Ireland, which is very green because of all the rain, and is known as the Emerald Isle. The word 'Isle' precedes 'of Dogs' and 'of Arran'. Arran is where they make big woolly jumpers. Wool is removed from sheep by a shearer. Shearer, first name Alan, likes to play golf in his spare time. The game of golf involves birdies and eagles. Eagles are what Carrie thinks she saw in Germany. Germany is where Boris Becker is from, and is where we last saw Noel Gallagher. Noel Gallagher is in Oasis, who enjoyed a chart battle in 1995 when their single 'Roll With It' went up against Blur's 'Country House', which links to Blur and 'Country House'.

Chris: Okay...
Dave: I'm thinking by your face that perhaps you don't have the same track listing as moi.
Rachel: Do you know that conversation we had the other day...?
Dave: Oh, we were gonna change it, weren't we? What were we gonna change it to?
Chris: Find it, quick.
Dave: No, hang on, what were we gonna change it to? You're right!
Chris: Well, once again this shows the fault in Tedious Link, where you say you've made it up as you go along...
Dave: No, you're right. We were gonna play The Clash, weren't we?
Chris: I just find it coincidental that I always have that CD standing by to play, whatever it may be, apart from today, where I don't.
Dave: I can do it again if you like, and link it to The Clash?
Chris: No...we can find it.
Dave: Germany is a country where The Clash probably played at one point, and...
Chris: No...
Dave:...which links us to The Clash!
Chris: But then it just ruins the entire link! Are you gonna play Blur, or are you gonna play The Clash?
Dave: I don't know. You decide. Let's play Blur.
Dom: What would P Diddy prefer, do you think?
Chris: I think he'd prefer to be on another show this morning. He'd probably prefer to still be in bed.
Dave: Or certainly for this link to be quicker.
Chris: He's standing there going, 'You got me out of bed for this? For these jokers? I'm working with these jokers?'
Rachel: How embarrassing, Dave. And when we've got a guest in.
Chris: You've just kissed goodbye to your free sneakers.
Dave: You're right, we did have that conversation.
Rachel: Because there's a documentary on Lamacq Live tonight, that's why.
Dave: I know, it was supposed to be corporate cross-promotion. That's why we did it.
Chris: Don't sell the Tedious Link out to big businessmen!
Dave: No, we're staying independent.
Rachel: But anyway...listen to Lamacq Live tonight anyway!
Dave: Just...right, play the record.
Chris: Hang on...Lamacq Live has got a documentary about Blur?
Dave: No, about The Clash.
Chris: Well why are we playing Blur?
Dave: Just play it.
Chris: I'm waiting for it to load! It takes, like, 60 seconds for it to load.
Dave: Well, we can fill.
Chris: Right. Apologise to everybody for making a balls-up of your track.
Dave: I'm very sorry. Rachel, you're right. We did have that meeting, and I apologise that I don't remember any of it.
Rachel: We could have got serious brownie points and everything, Dave. You ruined it.
Dom: How much time have you got to fill, Chris?
Chris: It's 86% loaded. Trust me, the second it's loaded, I'm playing it.
Dom: Do you want 23 seconds of Liverpool goals against Chelsea?
Chris: No...no, you're all right, I can handle it. Let's go!
Dave: That was smooth. I'd like to apologise to the music department, all the people on the team, to Rachel most importantly...and to P Diddy.

Flaws:

Seamless, despite the issue with the track itself.

Tedious Facts:

Released - August 1995

Highest UK Chart Position - #1

Listen to the Link:

http://chrismoyles.net/soundvault/sound ... ileid=1473
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By Nicola_Red
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Today's Tedious Link:

Macy Gray: I Try

Today's Transcript:

A country house is how you might describe Sandringham, which is the Queen's country residence in Norfolk. Norfolk is also where you'd find Great Yarmouth, which is famous for its pier. 'Pier' is an anagram of 'ripe', which is what a banana is when it turns yellow. 'Yellow' was a hit for Coldplay. Coldplay's Chris Martin is married to Gwyneth Paltrow, whose mum played Ben Stiller's future mother-in-law in 'Meet The Fockers' alongside Dustin Hoffman. Dustin Hoffman played an autistic man in 'Rainman', who had an incredible mind for numbers and stuff. Another man who has the ability to add numbers up really quickly and stuff is Michael Greco, who played Beppe in 'Eastenders'. Beppe's brother was called Gianni, and was played by Marc Bannerman, who's married to Nadia Sawalha, who's just started a new BBC show with Adrian Chiles. If you were to describe Adrian Chiles' hair you'd say it's going a bit grey, which links to Macy Grey and 'I Try'.

Flaws:

Seamless link.

Tedious Facts:

Released - October 1999

Highest UK Chart Position - #7
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By Nicola_Red
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Today's Tedious Link:

Primal Scream: Come Together

Today's Transcript:

Macy Gray is really tall, something she shares in common with Marilyn Manson. Marilyn Manson shares the same first name as Marilyn from 'Home and Away', who was played by Emily Symons, who's now in 'Emmerdale' with Roxanne Pallet, who goes out with Craig from 'Corrie', whose mum Sue jenkins was Jackie Corkhill in 'Brookside' alongside Philip Olivier, who's now in 'Hollyoaks In The City'. 'City Slickers' was a film starring Billy Crystal, who also starred in 'Sleepless In Seattle' with Meg Ryan. Ryan Giggs used to go out with Davinia Taylor, who's mates with sadie Frost, who's also mates with Russell Brand. Russell Brand shares the same surname as Jo Brand, who was in 'Fame Academy' in 2003, which was won by Edith Bowman, who's from Scotland. Scotland is where you'd see the Loch Ness Monster. 'Monster' is the current hit by The Automatic. The Automatic played Ibiza Rocks this summer along with Babyshambles. Pete Docherty of Babyshambles goes out with Kate Moss, who stole the show in all the recent photos of the wedding of Bobby Gillespie of Primal Scream, which links to Primal Scream and 'Come Together'.

Flaws:

Babyshambles didn't actually play at Ibiza Rocks due to passport issues, and Billy Crystal wasn't in 'Sleepless In Seattle'.

Tedious Facts:

Released - August 1990

Highest UK Chart Position - #26
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By Nicola_Red
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Today's Tedious Link:

Seal: Crazy

Today's Transcript:

Bobby Gillespie of Primal Scream shares the same first name as Bobby McFerrin, who had a hit with 'Don't Worry Be Happy', which featured on the soundtrack to the film '*', which starred Bryan Brown. Brown is the colour of many of the UK's cows. Stuff to do with cows is known as bovine. 'Bovine' sounds a bit like 'gluwhein', which you might make at Christmas from red wine and cloves. If you swap the first letter of 'cloves' for a 'G' you get 'gloves', which are what you'd put on your hands in the cold. Cold is how you serve gazpacho soup, which comes from Spain, as does Antonio Banderas. Banderas was also the name of an early 90s band, who had a hit with 'This Is Your Life'. 'This Is Your Life' was a classic tv show hosted by Michael Aspel, which we went to to be in the audience for David Dickinson. Dickinson begins with the letter 'D', which is the next-door neighbour of 'C'. The sea is where you'd find many different types of marine mammals such as the whale and seal, which links to Seal and 'Crazy'.

Flaws:

Some texters argued that most cows in the UK are not brown, and in fact some research confirms that the most common type of cow in this country are of the Holstein-Friesian breed, which are black and white. (More cow facts can be found at http://www.animalcorner.co.uk/farm/cows/cow_breeds.html.)

Tedious Facts:

Released - December 1990

Highest UK Chart Position - #2
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By Nicola_Red
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Today's Tedious Link:

Brothers In Rhythm: Such A Good Feeling

Today's Transcript:

Seals are a major food source for great white sharks, and the best way for a seal to avoid being eaten by a shark is to stay by its tail. 'Shark Tale' was an animated film that featured the voice of Renee Zellwegger. Renee Zellwegger has been interviewed by Dominic Byrne, and in that respect shares something in common with Bruce Willis. Bruce was the name of Arnold's older brother in 'Diff'rent Strokes'. Different strokes is what David Walliams has been doing a lot of. david Walliams' real name is actually Williams, but he had to change it for Equity, which is a sort of actors' union. 'Union Of The Snake' was a hit for Duran Duran in 1983. 1983 was the year that Kate Bosworth was born, and she goes out with Orlando Bloom. Orlando is in Florida, and is famous for being the holiday destination of David Seaman. Another David Seaman is one half of Brothers in Rhythm, which links to Brothers In Rhythm and 'Such A Good Feeling'.

Flaws:

Problem-free. Some people challenged Dave's fact about seals avoiding sharks, but Dave explained that he had recently watched a TV show on the subject of sharks, so was definitely correct on this.

Tedious Facts:

Released - September 1991

Highest UK Chart Position - #14
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By Nicola_Red
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Today's Tedious Link:

Chumbawamba: Tubthumping

Today's Transcript:

'Rhythm' is one of the few words in the English language that doesn't contain any vowels. Vowels and consonants are the two letter options on 'Countdown'. 'Countdown' is now hosted by Des Lynam, who used to do 'How Do They Do That' with Jenny Hull. Hull City drew on Saturday at Ipswich, who are known as the Tractor Boys. 'Tractor' rhymes with 'factor', as in 'X-Factor', which starts again on saturday with guest Paula Abdul. Paula Abdul had a hit with 'Straight Up'. Up is the opposite of down, which is the general direction of a submarine when it leaves the surface of the water. Water is currently in short supply as a result of leaky pipes. 'Pipes Of Peace' was a hit in 1983 for Paul McCartney, who that year won Best British Male Solo Artist at the Brit Awards. It was at the Brit Awards in 1998 that John Prescott was doused with water by Chumbawamba, which links to Chumbawamba and 'Tubthumping'.

Flaws:

There are more than a few words in English that contain no vowels - sky, why and hymn just off the top off my head - but no other problems.

Tedious Facts:

Released - August 1997

Highest UK Chart Position - #2
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By Nicola_Red
#446801
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Today's Tedious Link:

Cast: Finetime

Today's Transcript:

Tubthumping is an expression which refers to drumming. 'Drumming' rhymes with 'humming', as in a hummingbird, which is the smallest bird in the world. The world consists of the planet Earth, which floats around in space. Space is what you might need if you live in a really small flat and have lots of kids or lodgers or something. Lodgers are people who live in your house and pay rent. 'Rent' was a hit for the Pet Shop Boys. The Pet Shop Boys are made up of Chris Lowe and Neil Tennant. Tenants pay rent to their landlord. A landlord of a different type is someone who can bar you from their pub. If you swap the first letter of 'pub' for a 'C' you get 'cub', which is a term for a baby lion or tiger. 'Tiger Feet' was a hit for Mud. Mud is what you'd have on your feet if you were at a festival, where you'd probably also see lots of famous actors from soaps. A collection of actors on the same production are known as a cast, which links to Cast and 'Finetime'.

Flaws:

All fine today.

Tedious Facts:

Released - July 1995

Highest UK Chart Position - #17
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By Nicola_Red
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Today's Tedious Link:

Jamiroquai: Too Young To Die

Today's Transcript:

A cast is what you'd probably have to wear if you'd broken your leg. The leg is what links your foot to the rest of your body. 'Bodyrock' was a hit for Maria Vidal. Maria Vidal shares one name in common with Vidal Sassoon, who's a celebrity hairdresser and also makes shampoo and stuff. Shampoo is what you might find in the shower. A shower is also an expression referring to rain. 'Rain' was a hit for Madonna, who Aled saw the other week in concert in Cardiff. Cardiff is the home of Charlotte Church, who's about to host her own show on Channel 4. 4 is the square root of 16, which is two multiplied by 8. 8 is the number of legs you'd find on a funnel web spider. Funnel web spiders will often kill animals that are too young to die, which links to Jamiroquai and 'Too Young To Die'.

Flaws:

Watertight today.

Tedious Facts:

Released - March 1993

Highest UK Chart Position - #10
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By Nicola_Red
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Today's Tedious Link:

Sister Sledge: We Are Family

Today's Transcript:

Jay Kay of Jamiroquai has his own pub at his house called the Chequered Flag. The chequered flag in motor racing signifies that the race is over. 'Over' is a word frequently used in CB radio transmissions, along with 'roger'. Roger is a name that links 007 Moore with tennis player Federer. Tennis inbolves racquets and a net. Annette Bening starred in 'Bugsy' with warren Beatty. A warren is where you'd find rabbits. 'White rabbits' is what you're supposed to say on the first day of the month, along with 'pinch and a punch'. Punch is the puppet husband of Judy, while another Judy is the wife of Richard. Richard and Judy have got children, so if the children ever go down to watch the show they could say to security "we are family", which links to Sister Sledge and 'We Are Family'.

Flaws:

Seamless link.

Tedious Facts:

Released - May 1979

Highest UK Chart Position - #8
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By Nicola_Red
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Today's Tedious Link:

Bass-o-matic: Fascinating Rhythm

Today's Transcript:

'We Are Family' was a hit in the 70s, as was 'Hit Me With Your Rhythm Stick' by Ian Dury. Ian Dury shares the same first name as Ian Botham, who was a big name in the world of cricket. Cricket was this week thrown into controversy after the abandonment of the test match between England and Pakistan. Pakistan is where Imran Khan is from, who's married and I think now separated from Jemima Khan, who I think is now seeing Hugh Grant. Hugh Grant starred in 'Four Weddings and a Funeral', the soundtrack to which featured 'Love Is All Around' by Wet Wet Wet in 1994. 1994 was also the year that Prince released 'Let It Go', three years after the release of 'Cream'. Creamfields takes place this weekend in Cheshire, featuring the Prodigy. The Prodigy's Liam Howlett is the other half of Natalie Appleton from All Saints. All Saints' hit 'Pure Shores' was produced by William Orbit, who was the man behind Bass-o-Matic, which links to Bass-O-Matic and 'Fascinating Rhythm'.

Flaws:

Jemima and Imran Khan are not just separated but divorced, and in fact she has also now split from Hugh Grant.

Tedious Facts:

Released - September 1990

Highest UK Chart Position - #9
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By Nicola_Red
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Today's Tedious Link:

Pulp: Common People

Today's Transcript:

'Fascinating Rhythm' was released in 1990, the same year that 'Black Velvet' was a hit for Alannah Myles. Miles are the unit of measurement for distance in this country. 'Country' in the context of music is generally paired with the word 'Western'. Western is the opposite of Eastern, as in the Easternmost point in the UK, which is Lowestoft. Lowestoft is where The Darkness are from. According to newspaper reports, Justin Hawkins of the Darkness is in the Priory with Tom from Keane. Keane, first name Robbie, will have been disappointed by his side's performance on Saturday, when they were beaten by Everton, who only had ten men. 'Ten' is the title of an album by Pearl Jam, who this weekend played Reading and Leeds. Leeds were away to Sheffield Wednesday on Sunday. The city of Sheffield is famous for producing many musicians including Pulp, which links to Pulp and 'Common People'.

Flaws:

Wateright.

Tedious Facts:

Released - June 1995

Highest UK Chart Position - #2
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By Nicola_Red
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Today's Tedious Link:

Arrested Development: People Everyday

Today's Transcript:

If you remove the 'L' from 'pulp' you're left with 'pup', which is what you call a baby seal. Seal had a hit with 'Kiss From A Rose', and is now going out with Heidi Klum. Heidi Klum is one of only three famous Heidis, along with Heidi Fleiss and Heidi Range from the Sugababes, who goes out with Dave Berry, who I don't think is any relation to Nick Berry from 'Heartbeat'. 'Heartbeat' was set in the Yorkshire Dales. Allan Dale played Jim Robinson in 'Neighbours'. Jim Robinson was the dad of Paul, who's still in 'Neighbours' and presumably still keeps in touch with the Alessi twins, who were played by Gail and Gillian Blakeney. 'Blakeney' nearly rhymes with 'bakery', which is where you get fresh bread. Bread is considered a delicacy in Russia, where people queue up for it. If you lived in Moscow you'd probably see these queues of people every day, which links to Arrested Development and 'People Everyday'.

Flaws:

Several issues today. Bread isn't a delicacy in Russia, it was just historically in short supply; Seal is now married to Heidi Klum, rather than just dating; 'Heartbeat' is set on the Yorkshire Moors, not the Dales; and another famous Heidi is the title character of the TV show based on the Swiss book.

Tedious Facts:

Released - October 1992

Highest UK Chart Position - 2
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By Nicola_Red
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Today's Tedious Link:

Natalie Imbruglia: Big Mistake

Today's Transcript:

Arrested Development's first single was called 'Tennessee', which is an American state with a capital called Nashville. Nashville has a rich heritage in country music. Country music is a genre that includes Kenny Rogers and Dolly Parton, who duetted on 'Islands In The Stream'. A stream is not dissimilar to a brook. Brooke Shields used to go out with Andre Agassi, who's now married to Steffi Graf. A graph is what you might have to draw in maths. Maths is a good skill to have if you want to be good at Sudoku. Sudoku originated in Japan, along with karaoke. Karaoke is popular in pubs, where people can demonstrate their inability to sing. 'Sing' was a hit for Travis. Travis Dean was a former 'Neighbours' character, as is Beth Brennan. Beth Brennan was played by Natalie Imbruglia, which links to Natalie Imbruglia and 'Big Mistake'.

Flaws:

It's only two months since Dave last used his fact about the invention of sudoku, and there were quibbles on the text then. It remains that in fact puzzles resembling modern Sudoku were first seen in French newspapers in the late 1800s, but the modern Sudoku was most likely designed anonymously by Howard Garns from Indiana, and first published in 1979 by Dell Magazines as 'Number Place'.

Tedious Facts:

Released - March 1998

Highest UK Chart Position - #2
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By Nicola_Red
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Today's Tedious Link:

Daft Punk: Digital Love

Today's Transcript:

The video for 'Big Mistake' features the same bloke who's in that ad for the Renault Clio. If you remove the first letter of 'Clio' and then reverse the remaining three letters you get 'oil', which is something you get from the North Sea, along with fish. Fish are caught using fish nets, and fishnets are also a type of stockings, although the two are unrelated. Unrelated is how you might describe Dominic Byrne and Eddie Murphy. Eddie Murphy is apparently going out with Mel B of the Spice Girls. The Spice Girls also included Victoria Beckham, who's mates with Cheryl Tweedy, who's married to Ashley Cole, who last night completed a move to Chelsea. Chelsea are currently in fifth place in the Premiership table, just behind Everton who are joint third. 'Third' rhymes with 'bird', and birds are what you'd expect to see in an aviary. There's an aviary at London Zoo, where they also have stuff like elephants and camels. Camels' toes are important to them for stability in the sands of North Africa, much of which is French-speaking. When you think of French-speaking bands you think of Daft Punk, which links to Daft Punk and 'Digital Love'.

Flaws:

The bloke from the Renault ad is in the Natalie Imbruglia video for 'Torn', not 'Big Mistake'.

Tedious Facts:

Released - June 2001

Highest UK Chart Position - #14
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By Nicola_Red
#446809
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Today's Tedious Link:

S-Express and Theme from S Express.

Today's Transcript:

Daft Punk Digital Love - Daft Punk are from France which is famous for its revolution - "Revolution" is a title of a track by The Beatles - The only two surviving members of The Beatles are Paul McCartney and Ringo Starr - Ringo Starr's son Zak Starkey is also a drummer and has played with Oasis, who are from Manchester, as is Max Beesley who stars in the BBC One series "Hotel Babylon" - Babylon Zoo was a short lived Asian Black Country outfit who scored a number one hit in January 1996 with "Spaceman" - A spaceman is how you might describe Neil Armstrong - Neil Armstrong shares the same last name as Chris Armstrong, who has played for Crystal Palace and Spurs - Spurs will no doubt still be licking their wounds after playing Everton last week - Week is apparently a long time in politics - Politics is what Tony Blair is into - Tony Blair took over from John Major who was in power with the Conservatives, when he in turn took over from Margaret Thatcher in the year 1990 - and you only have to go back two years from 1990 to reach the year 1988, when lots of good music was released, such as the number one from S-Express titled "Theme from S Express" - Which links us to S-Express and Theme from S Express.

Flaws:

None pointed out by the team, but the track seemed a little faster than Chris remembered.

Our Tedious Facts:

Released - April 1988

Highest UK Chart Position - #1

(Fish heads/MC)
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By Nicola_Red
#446810
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Today's Tedious Link:

Beck and Loser.

Today's Transcript:

S-Express Theme from S Express - If you remove the "press" from "S-Express" you get "Essex", the county which gave us Denise Van Outen - Denise Van Outen is doing the rounds at the moment having been a guest on both the new shows of Charlotte Church and Sharon Osbourne - Sharon Osbourne is married to Ozzy Sharon Osbourne, who once famously bit the head off a bat - "Bat Out Of Hell" was a big hit for Meatloaf, who recently took part in "Celebrity All Star Golf", which was hosted by Ant and Dec - Ant and Dec support Newcastle United, who are nicknamed the Magpies - Magpies tend to be seen in pairs and in that respect share something in common with swans - All the swans in the UK belong to the Queen and that's why it's illegal to eat any of them - The Queen also owns all of the parks and prisons as well - Prisons are somewhere where it is illegal to show home videos, as are schools and oil rigs - If you work on an oil rig I would imagine you would enjoy returning home once in a while and coming back - If you swap the A in "back" for an E then you get Beck - Which links us to Beck and Loser.

Flaws:

There were lots of flaws on the text, but Dave couldn't understand most of them and deemed them "inadmissible". Chris pointed out that the press/Essex link doesn't work at all in actual spelling. It turns out Dave was working phonetically and even then it doesn't work fully. Also I personally take issue that home videos aren't illegal in schools and oil rigs, Dave is thinking of the warning appearing on commercially available DVDs.

Our Tedious Facts:

Released - March 1994

Highest UK Chart Position - #15

(Fish heads/MC)
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By Nicola_Red
#446811
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Today's Tedious Link:

Zoe and Sunshine On A Rainy Day.

Today's Transcript:

Beck Loser - Beck, first name Mikkel is a striker who used to play for Middlesbrough - Middlesbrough is situated on the River Tees - T's are what you have to cross when you dot your I's - "Eyes Without A Face" was a big hit for Billy Idol - Billy Idol shares the same surname (albeit phonetically) as Eric Idle, who was in Monty Python - A python is a type of large snake - The plural of "snake" is "snakes", as in "Snakes On A Plane", a current movie starring Samuel L. Jackson - Samuel L. Jackson is famous for wearing a flat cap backwards, as is Ben Volpeliere-Pierrot from Curiosity Killed The Cat - The plural of "cat" is "cats", which like to catch mice - Mice like to eat cheese - "Cheese!" is what a photographer might say to you when you are posing for a picture at a wedding - and if you were working as a photographer on a rainy day perhaps, you would be hoping for a spot of sunshine - Which links us to Zoe and Sunshine On A Rainy Day.

Flaws:

None pointed out, although someone on the text did question how many times Dave has used this track for Tedious Link. The answer - too many.

Our Tedious Facts:

Released - August 1991

Highest UK Chart Position - #4

(Fish heads/MC)
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