Transcripts of Dave's Tedious Links
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By Nicola_Red
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Today's Tedious Link:

U2, The Fly

Today's Transcript:

'Dirty Cash' has just been reworked by the one and only Mr Dizzee Rascal. Dizzee Rascal wasn't actually christened Dizzee, and his real name is Dylan. Dylan Thomas was the name of a famous Welsh poet, who I think is the inspiration behind Catherine Zeta Jones and Michael Douglas naming their son Dylan. Michael Douglas has been in loads of stuff, including 'Wall Street', 'Romancing The Stone' and 'Falling Down'. Falling down is what you don't want to be doing if you're taking part in gymnastics. Gymnastics is the only sport I know that involves a horse and a box. A box is what you might buy posh chocolates in, which can be combined with flowers as a safe lady-present. 'Present' is the opposite of 'past', which described everything that has happened in history. History is something that I wasn't very good at at school. 'School' is also the collective term for a group or herd of fish. Fish are caught by anglers, who have all sorts of stuff in their fishing kit, including nets, a rod, worms and maybe even a fly, which links to U2 and 'The Fly'.

Flaws:

"Gymnastics is the only sport I know that involves a horse and a box." How about...horse racing?

Tedious Facts:

Released - November 1991

Highest UK Chart Position - #1

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By Nicola_Red
#435932
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Today's Tedious Link:

N-Trance, Set You Free

Today's Transcript:

'The Fly' was released in the year 2001, which was last night's featured year on Radio 1's 'Story Of The Noughties', and did you know that 'The Fly' was released for a limited time only, and in doing so succeeded in ending the record-breaking run at the top of the charts by Bryan Adams with his monster hit '(Everything I Do) I Do It For You'. Bryan Adams is from Canada, which is a bit like America, but colder. 'Colder' rhymes with 'holder', which is what you put your cup in if you've got one in the car and like to drink coffee or tea while driving. Driving is what Jeremy Clarkson likes to do a lot of on 'Top Gear', along with James May and Richard Hammond. Hammond is a type of organ, which was a cornerstone, musically, of Manchester band The Inspiral Carpets, who at one time had a famous roadie in the form of Noel Gallagher. Noel Gallagher has fallen out with brother Liam, resulting in the current split in the band Oasis. An oasis is a bit like a desert version of a motorway services, where you can fill your camel up with water. Water is also what you give to your pot plants to stop them dying when you go away on holiday. 'Holiday' is a song title that links Madonna with the band Green Day. The last letter in the word 'Green' is 'N', and when you think of the letter 'N' in the world of music you think of course of N-Trance, which links to N-Trance and 'Set You Free'.

Flaws:

'The Fly' did indeed knock Bryan Adams off no1, but it wasn't released in 2001, it was 1991!

Tedious Facts:

Released - May 1994 (remixes released in January 1995 and September 2001)

Highest UK Chart Position - #39 (remixes #2 and #4 respectively)

Dave last linked to this track only two months ago - obviously another favourite.

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By Nicola_Red
#435933
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Today's Tedious Link:

Happy Mondays, Step On

Today's Transcript:

Free is what you might want to be if you were an eagle that had been raised in captivity. Eagles are big carnivorous birds, who eat rats and squirrels and basically anything small enough for them to carry. Carrie is the lady who does the sport on this show, and she's married to Tom, who's in the army now. 'In The Army Now' was a big hit for Status Quo 23 years ago in October 1986. October 1986 is also the year that Bon Jovi had a mega-hit with 'Livin' On A Prayer', and Bon Jovi will be in the Live Lounge with Fearne this coming Friday, only on BBC Radio 1. 'Juan' is a popular name for boys in Spain. Spain is a nice place to go on holiday, especially if you like tapas, hot sunshine and cold beer. Beer is made from hops, while hops of a different type are what rabbits like to do. 'Do' rhymes with 'boo', which is what you should never say to a goose. Goose is the name of a character in the classic film 'Top Gun', who dies near the beginning and is married to Meg Ryan. Ryan Thomas is the actor who plays Jason Grimshaw in 'Coronation Street', which is filmed in Manchester. Manchester is where the Happy Mondays are from, which links to The Happy Mondays and 'Step On'.

Flaws:

There was an issue today as to when the character of Goose dies in 'Top Gun'. The wiki plot summary describes his death as being subsequent to several other events in the film, implying that it's not near the beginning at all. (I haven't seen Top Gun.)

Tedious Facts:

Released - April 1990

Highest UK Chart Position - #5

Dave last linked to this track back in September 2002.

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By Nicola_Red
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Today's Tedious Link:

House Of Pain, Jump Around

Today's Transcript:

Step on is what an old fashioned bus conductor might say to you if you were attempting to board an old Routemaster-style bus via the rear platform while the bus was safely stationary at a designated bus stop. 'Stop' was a big hit for The Spice Girls, whose Mel B is currently taking part in a show that sees her trying to live for a week on the breadline. Bread has been around since the days of Jesus, when he fed it to the five hundred. Five hundred in * monetary slang is a monkey. The plural of 'monkey' is 'monkeys', which like to eat bananas and swing on ropes and stuff at the zoo. Zoo is the name of a national publication that celebrates men's culture and also feminine beauty through its use of glossy images. 'Glossy' rhymes with 'bossy', which is how you might describe someone who's always telling you what to do. If you lose the last 'O' in 'to do' and add a 'Y' and an 'A' you get 'today', which is Thursday, which is the day before Friday, which is officially my favourite day of the week. A week, in terms of days, totals the number seven, and 'seven' rhymes with 'heaven', which is where you hopefully go if you're very good, as opposed to hell, which is where bad people go to be punished and live in what we might describe as a 'house of pain', which links to House Of Pain and 'Jump Around'.

Flaws:

Dave gets his Bible stories mixed up once again - Jesus fed the five thousand with bread (and fishes), not five hundred.

Tedious Facts:

Released - October 1992 (re-released in May 1993)

Highest UK Chart Position - #32 (#8 on re-release)

Another track last linked to back in September 2002.

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By Nicola_Red
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Today's Tedious Link:

Editors, Bullets

Today's Transcript:

Pain is something that I don't enjoy very much, which is probably why I've never tried kickboxing or accupuncture. Accupuncture involves sticking a load of strategically placed needles into your skin for medicinal purposes. The word 'purposes' sounds a bit like 'porpoises', which are a type of marine mammal not dissimilar to a seal. Seal the singer had several hits during the 1990s, one of his best known being the 1994 mega-smash 'Kiss From A Rose'. Rose, first name Axl, is the lead singer of Guns N' Roses, whose 'Sweet Child O' Mine' was covered on Saturday night by Lucy Jones on 'X Factor'. 'X' is the letter normally used to mark buried treasure on a pirate's treasure map. The plural of 'map' is 'maps', which are one of the hardest things in the world to fold. 'Twofold' basically means 'double', while the ability to fold a pizza is crucial if you're making a calzone. 'Calzone' sounds a bit like 'Calzaghe', as in Joe Calzaghe, the Welsh boxing legend, who recently got voted off 'Strictly Come Dancing'. The name 'Joe' is a three-letter abbreviation of a longer man's name, and in that respect shares something in common with the names 'Tim' and 'Tom'. Tom is the name of the lead singer of Editors, which links to Editors and 'Bullets'.

Flaws:

Listeners on the text claimed that porpoises are completely dissimilar to seals and more like dolphins - this is really a matter of opinion, as all are marine mammals. Additionally, 'Axl' Rose's first name is technically 'W' (for William), but this is a mere technicality.

Tedious Facts:

Released - October 2005

Highest UK Chart Position - #27

This is Joe Calzaghe's third Tedious namecheck in recent weeks.

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By Nicola_Red
#435936
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Today's Tedious Link:

PM Dawn, Set Adrift On Memory Bliss

Today's Transcript:

Editors are the important people in the world of newspapers, cos they decide what goes in, and what makes it to print. 'Print' rhymes with both 'mint' and 'tint', the latter being something that a hairdresser might be good at, especially in the world of colour. Colour is something that not everyone can recognise, and those who cannot distinguish one colour from another are said to be colourblind. 'Colourblind' was a big hit for former singing star Darius Danesh. Darius Danesh shares the same initials as David Duchovny, who used to star in 'X Files', and was once an uncomfortable looking guest on 'The One Show', and in that respect shares something in common with Sting, who was on last night. Sting is from Newcastle-upon-Tyne, a bit like Cheryl Cole and Jimmy Nail. If you swap the first letter of 'nail' for its alphabetic next door neighbout 'M' you get 'mail', which is something that has been piling up of late due to industrial action. Action is a category of films that you might see in a video shop, along with stuff like comedy, romance, adult and thriller. 'Thriller' was the title of Michael Jackson's mega-selling album, which spawned the hits 'Billie Jean' and 'Beat It', and it was this very album that has influenced so many people over the years from the world of music, particularly PM Dawn, which links to PM Dawn and 'Set Adrift On Memory Bliss'.

Flaws:

Seamless today.

Tedious Facts:

Released - August 1991

Highest UK Chart Position - #3

Dave last linked to this track in June 2007.

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By Nicola_Red
#435937
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Today's Tedious Link:

George Michael, Freedom

Today's Transcript:

Dawn is the first name of actress and comedienne Dawn French, who's not actually French, but is the other half of comedian and hotel connoisseur Lenny Henry. Lenny Henry shares one name in common with Henry VIII, who was married more than me and Ross from 'Friends' put together. 'Together Forever' was a big hit for Rick Astley, who recently became semi-famous again as the result of an online campaign. Online is where you wouldn't want to be in the world of angling if you were an actual fish. Fish are a rich source of omega-3 oils, which are good for you. 'U' is the alphabetic next-door neighbour of 'T' and 'V', while TV was invented years ago by a man called John Logie Baird, who was from Scotland, like The Proclaimers. The Proclaimers are famously twins, and in that respect are a bit like an older, talented, Jon and Edward. Jon and Edward must be voted off 'X-Factor' with immediate effect. 'Immediate' means 'now', while 'now' with an 'S' on the front is 'snow'. Snow can cause traffic chaos as it blocks roads in some areas, which can be very disruptive. If George Michael got trapped in a snowdrift and fell asleep and then got rescued by the emergency services, he would no doubt relish his freedom, which links to George Michael and 'Freedom'.

Flaws:

Nothing to report.

Tedious Facts:

Released - December 1990

Highest UK Chart Position - #28

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By Nicola_Red
#435938
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Today's Tedious Link:

Guns N' Roses, November Rain

Today's Transcript:

Freedom by George Michael was released in the year 1990, when the World Cup was held in Italy. Italy is a nice country to visit, especially around the banks of Lake Como, where you could be rubbing shoulders with showbiz A-Listers like George Clooney and Louis Walsh. Louis Walsh is the mentor for 'X-Factor' contestants Jon and Edward. Edward the Confessor was a famous King years ago, around the time of Mary Queen of Scots and King Harold. Harold Bishop is a 'Neighbours' character played by actor Ian Smith, who, like most Australian actors, was, at one point, in 'Prisoner: Cell Block H'. 'H', in terms of numerical order within the alphabet, is number 8. Number 8 is a position in rugby where someone really massive and tall pushes from the back of the scrum. 'Scrum' rhymes with 'bum', which is possibly Lady GaGa's best physical quality. Quality is what you expect, deserve and receive on this show, every morning from 6.30. 6.30 is only half an hour before seven o'clock, while the plural of 'clock' is 'clocks', which are made on a large scale in Switzerland. Switzerland is somewhere that's very green, which means that, like us, they probably get quite a lot of rain at this time of year. Rain at this time of year is what I would call 'November rain', which links to Guns N' Roses and 'November Rain'.

Flaws:

A history problem today. Dave claimed that Edward the Confessor was around at the time of Mary Queen of Scots and King Harold (Edward lived between 1003 and 1066). Dave doesn't specify which King Harold he means, but if we assume it's the one who died during the Battle of Hastings, that Harold was around at roughly the same time as Edward (circa 1022-1066). But Mary Queen of Scots wasn't born until 1542!

Tedious Facts:

Released - March 1992

Highest UK Chart Position - #4

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By Nicola_Red
#435939
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Today's Tedious Link:

The Darkness, I Belive In A Thing Called Love

Today's Transcript:

Rain is something that you don't get very often in the desert, which is why they tend to be so dry. Dry is the opposite of wet, which is how you might describe a swimming pool. A swimming pool is somewhere that you take a towel. 'Towel' rhymes with 'Cowell', as in Simon Cowell, who last night put the vote to deadlock, which saw the twins survive once again at the expense of Lucy Jones. Lucy Jones shares the same initials as Leon Jackson, who won 'X-Factor' two years ago, and is now presumably working on new material. 'Material Girl' was a big hit years ago foe Madonna, who is originally of Italian descent, a bit like Frankie Detorri. Frankie Detorri supports Arsenal, who won again at the weekend, putting them second in the league behind Chelsea. Chelsea is the name of the daughter of Bill Clinton, who is a former President of the United States of America. The Presidents of the United States of America had two main hits entitled 'Lump' and 'Peaches'. Peaches Geldof is the daughter of Bob Geldof, who certainly wasn't famous in her own right in the year 2003. 2003 is featured tonight on BBC Radio 1's 'Story of the Noughties', and was also the year that The Darkness came to light, which links to The Darkness and 'I Believe In A Thing Called Love'.

Flaws:

Presidents of the USA had a third hit in addition to the two named by Dave, 'Dune Buggy', which equalled the UK chart success of 'Lump' by reaching #15 in July 1996.

Tedious Facts:

Released - October 2003

Highest UK Chart Position - #2

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By Nicola_Red
#435940
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Today's Tedious Link:

U2, Beautiful Day

Today's Transcript:

The darkness is what you'd be in if you'd not paid your 'leccy bill and the supplier had cut you off. Cut off is how you might describe one of the ears of Dutch artist Vincent Van Gogh. Van Gogh shares one name in common with Denise Van Outen and Robin Van Persie, who are both possibly of Dutch origin. Dutch people tend to be very relaxed, and are very good at languages, especially English. The English language is one of the most widely spoken on the planet, along with Chinese and Spanish. The Spanish are good at sailing, bullfighting and making omelettes, which is why they colonised much of the world. The World Series, in the sport of baseball, is something that only involves America. 'America' was the title of a hit a few years ago for Razorlight, whose frontman Johnny Borrell wears tight jeans, a bit like Nick Grimshaw. Grimmy hosted BBC Switch Live on Sunday, along with Kimberley Walsh from Girls Aloud. Girls Aloud's 'Biology' is one of the favourite all-time ever records of our very own birthday boy Dominic Byrne, it's his birthday today, it's a beautiful day, which links to U2 and 'Beautiful Day'.

Flaws:

Fraught with problems today. Firstly, Van Gogh did not cut off his entire ear, only the lower part of his left lobe. Robin Van Persie is not just "possibly of Dutch origin", he is Dutch (born in Rotterdam). Although Spanish is one of the most widely spoken languages after Chinese and English, Dave missed out Hindi, which is spoken by an estimated 600 million people worldwide (compared to 500 million Spanish speakers). The World Series does not only involve America; Canadian teams compete too, and indeed the Toronto Blue Jays last won the Series in 1993. None of these flaws were pointed out on the show...

Tedious Facts:

Released - October 2000

Highest UK Chart Position - #1

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By Nicola_Red
#435941
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Today's Tedious Link:

Madonna, Into The Groove

Today's Transcript:

We hope that yesterday really was a beautiful day for Dominic Byrne, as it was his birthday. Birthdays happen once a year, a bit like Easter and Christmas. Christmas will be here before we know it, and already top celebrities such as Chico and The Cheeky Girls will possibly be pressing the big switch and turning on Christmas lights in a town centre near you. 'Near' is the opposite of 'far', which is what you can't see clearly if you're short-sighted. Short-sighted people should go to the opticians for regular eye tests, and might need to wear glasses. Glasses of a different type are what you have to collect if you work in a pub. If you add an 'E' to the end of 'pub', you get a type of hair you wouldn't want to find on the soap. The plural of 'soap' is 'soaps', which is how you might describe 'Emmerdale', 'Coronation Street' and 'Eastenders'. 'Eastenders' is soon going to lose the services of Barbara Windsor, who shares one name in common with a famous castle owned by the Royal Family. The Royal Family are a major tourist attraction, a bit like Edinburgh Castle or the London Eye. London is where Madonna used to spend a load of her time when she used to be married to Mr Guy Ritchie, which links to Madonna and 'Into The Groove'.

Flaws:

Seamless today.

Tedious Facts:

Released - July 1985

Highest UK Chart Position - #1

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By Nicola_Red
#435942
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Today's Tedious Link:

MC Hammer, U Can't Touch This

Today's Transcript:

The plural of 'groove' is 'grooves', which rhymes with 'hooves', which are basically the horse equivalent of feet. Feet is an imperial measurement of length and height, used regularly in civil aviation to measure how high a plane is above the ground. The ground is what archeologists like to dig in when they're looking for buried artefacts and treasure. Treasure is what pirates used to look for in the olden days, and people used to make treasure maps indicating the location of buried booty, with the use of the letter 'X' to mark the spot. Spot is a good name for a pet tiger, as is Tony or Ian. Ian Beale is the 'Eastenders' character played by actor Adam Woodyatt, who supports Liverpool like Dominic Byrne. Burn is what you do to old stuff on Bonfire Night, to celebrate the death of Guy Fawkes. Forks of a different type make up approximately one-third of all cutlery. If you remove the first four letters from the word 'cutlery' and replace them with 'A', 'R', 'C' and 'H' you get 'archery', which would probably be Robin Hood's best event if he'd been in the Olympics. The Olympics consists of lots of other different track and field events, such as javelin, discus, shotput and the hammer. When you think of the word 'hammer' in the world of credible old-school rap music you think of MC Hammer, which links to MC Hammer and 'U Can't Touch This'.

Flaws:

Bonfire Night doesn't celebrate the death of Guy Fawkes, but the downfall of the plot to destroy the Houses of Parliament that he was charged with executing. Fawkes did not die until the January following the plot.

Tedious Facts:

Released - June 1990

Highest UK Chart Position - #3

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By Nicola_Red
#435943
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Today's Tedious Link:

The Streets, Dry Your Eyes

Today's Transcript:

MC Hammer was famous for wearing big trousers and for being a preacher man, and appropriately also had a hit called 'Pray'. Pray is what you do in church, and it's traditional at that point to kneel. Neil Armstrong is the name of the first American man on the moon, and it was him that famously uttered the immortal words, "one small step for man, one giant leap for mankind". Kind is how you might describe famous celebrities from history, such as Florence Nightingale or Mother Teresa. Trees are green in summer, but now that the leaves have gone they're more autumnal and bare. Barenaked Ladies are the Canadian band who had a big hit in the late 90s with 'One Week'. One week is made up of a grand total of seven days. 'Seven Days In The Sun' was a big hit for Feeder, whose lead singer Grant Nicholas is Welsh, like Aled. The name 'Aled' is an anagram of 'dale'. The plural of 'dale' is 'dales', such as the Yorkshire Dales, which is an area of outstanding natural beauty. Outstanding natural beauty is not normally a description that you'd associate with Birmingham. Birmingham is the home of Mike Skinner from The Streets, which links to The Streets and 'Dry Your Eyes'.

Flaws:

Neil Armstrong's words on setting foot on the moon were actually "one small step for a man...", but the line is widely misquoted, mainly due to the limits of communications technology at the time of the broadcast. Chris questioned Dave's reference to 'One Week' as a "big" hit, but it did in fact reach #5 in the UK charts, so all seems well with that.

Tedious Facts:

Released - July 2004

Highest UK Chart Position - #1

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By Nicola_Red
#435944
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Today's Tedious Link:

The Shamen, Ebeneezer Goode

Today's Transcript:

Dry your eyes is what you'd have to do if you'd been chopping onions to put in your spaghetti bolognese. Spaghetti bolognese is apparently the most popular meal for mums to cook for their children. 'Children' was the title of a 1996 hit for Robert Miles, who despite having a British-sounding name, is actually Swiss. The Swiss don't like to get involved in conflict, and instead prefer to make small gadget knives for the army, chocolate and cuckoo clocks. 'Clocks' was the title of a big hit for Coldplay, whose singer Chris Martin has a daughter called Apple. The plural of 'apple' is 'apples', which grow in large orchards in places like Somerset, where they used to make cider and apple pies. If you add an additional 'P' to the middle of the word 'pies' you get 'pipes', which can get frozen in the winter. Winter, first name Jeff, is a former Premier League referee who now does some work for the media. Media is what I did at college, combined with Business Studies. Business is what Sir Alan Sugar is very good at, where he's developed an empire from nothing, a bit like a seed becoming a big flower. The best known part of a flower, I think, is the stamen, and 'stamen' rhymes with 'Shamen', which links to The Shamen and 'Ebeneezer Goode'.

Flaws:

Nothing to report today.

Tedious Facts:

Released - September 1992

Highest UK Chart Position - #1

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By Nicola_Red
#435945
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Today's Tedious Link:

The Verve, The Drugs Don't Work

Today's Transcript:

Good is the opposite of bad, and the words 'good' and 'bad' are often combined with the word 'ugly' to make 'The Good, The Bad and The Ugly'. 'Ugly Betty' is a big show from America which stars Scottish actress Ashley Jensen and Alan Dale who used to be Jim Robinson in 'Neighbours'. Everybody needs good neighbours, because good neighbours become good friends. 'Friends' is a long-running US sitcom which is still on at pretty much every minute of every day somewhere in telly-land. Land is what the American settlers took from the Native American Indians, meaning they all had to move and live in reservations. Reservations are what you have to have to get a good table at a posh restaurant. The word 'restaurant' is the same in both the English and French languages, as are words like 'hotel', 'camembert' and 'baguette'. If you remove the first two letters of 'baguette' and replace the last letter with an 'A' you get 'Guetta', as in David Guetta, who is a French DJ and producer who recently worked on a track with Akon called 'Sexy Chick', which they apparently wrote together at Radio 1's Big Weekend in Swindon. If you travel 165 miles or so North of Swindon you get to Billinge near Wigan, and Billinge is where Richard Ashcroft is from, which links to The Verve and 'The Drugs Don't Work'.

Flaws:

David Guetta is actually Yemenite, not French. Additionally, while Dave loves to cite 'baguette' and other words like 'camembert' as "words that are the same in English and French", the fact remains that they are French words that have been adopted wholesale into English, which is a different thing altogether.

Tedious Facts:

Released - September 1997

Highest UK Chart Position - #1

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By Nicola_Red
#435946
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Today's Tedious Link:

Neneh Cherry, Buffalo Stance

Today's Transcript:

The plural of 'verve' is 'verves', and 'verves' rhymes with 'nerves', which can be sensitive in your teeth. Teeth is what you do if you're a dentist. Dentists use drills and scrapes and stuff, and have special chairs which go up and down, and special little drinky-fountain things which contain weird testing pink water. Pink the singer is not really called Pink, and was actually born Alecia Moore years ago in America. America is the country that Barack Obama is President of, and it's been nearly a year since he was sworn into office in the White House. Whitehouse, first name Paul, works with Harry Enfield and also starred in 'The Fast Show'. 'Fast Love' was a big hit for George Michael, who is of Greek origin, a bit like Pythagoras, Peter Andre and Theo Paphitis. Theo Paphitis is mates with Peter Jones, and they're both on 'Dragons' Den' with Ducan Bannatyne, who used to sell ice-cream. Ice-cream is a popular dessert and has been around since the time of the Roman Emperor Nero. 'Nero' rhymes with 'hero', which was a big hit for Mariah Carey, who's doing 'X-Factor' this week, along with Susan Boyle. If you have a boil on your bum, it could grow to be quite large and red, about the same size and shape of an average-sized cherry. When you think of the name 'Cherry' in the contexrt of female rappers from the late 80s you think of Neneh Cherry, which links to Neneh Cherry and 'Buffalo Stance'.

Flaws:

Watertight today.

Tedious Facts:

Released - December 1998

Highest UK Chart Position - #3

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By Nicola_Red
#435947
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Today's Tedious Link:

The Doves, Black And White Town

Today's Transcript:

A buffalo is like a big cow or bull-type animal that is famous for producing its own mozzarella cheese. Mozzarella cheese is often found on pizzas and is popular in Italian cuisine. Italian cuisine is also based on a staple of pasta, which is a good thing to eat before you undertake a massive run like a marathon. As well as being a 26-mile physical endurance, Marathon is also the old name for Snickers. If you swap the first letter of 'Snickers' for a 'K' you get 'knickers', which are like the girl version of underpants. Underpants come in different types, such as Y fronts and boxers. 'Boxers' is the plural of 'boxer', as in David Haye, and 'boxer' is also the name for an ugly-faced dog. If you put the word 'hot' before 'dog' you get 'hotdog', which is an American food consisting of a sausage and a long sausage-length bun. 'Bun' rhymes with 'nun', which is what Whoopi Goldberg was in the film 'Sister Act' and 'Sister Act II'. Whoopi Goldberg hosts a show now in the States called 'The View', which is basically like an American version of 'Loose Women'. Women tend to enjoy a night out in Newcastle-upon-Tyne, and if you were to describe Newcastle-upon-Tyne in terms of football colours you'd say it was a 'black and white town', which links to The Doves and 'Black And White Town'.

Flaws:

Technically speaking Whoopi Goldberg doesn't play a nun in 'Sister Act', but a lounge singer under protective custody in a convent who pretends to be a nun when a mob boss puts her on his hit list. I'm also not entirely sure what Dave was getting at with his "Women tend to enjoy a night out in Newcastle-upon-Tyne" statement - all women?...

Tedious Facts:

Released - February 2005

Highest UK Chart Position - #6

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By Nicola_Red
#435948
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Today's Tedious Link:

Snow, Informer

Today's Transcript:

Black and white are the colours you'd associate with a zebra. 'Zebra' begins with a 'Z', which is the last letter of the alphabet. The alphabet was invented years ago by the ancient Greeks. 'Greek' rhymes with 'seek', which is one option in the game of Hide and Seek, along with hiding. Hiding of a different type is like a proper smack on the bum. The plural of 'bum' is 'bums', which are what Dominic likes to do at the start of Car Park Catchphrase. Car Park Catchphrase is hosted by Roy Walker, who's from Northern Ireland, like Paddy Kielty and Ash. Ash is what you get in the bottom of a fire. Offiah, first name Martin, is a former rugby professional from both codes. Codes are what you'd try to crack if you were a secret spy. The plural of 'spy' is 'spies', as in 'Spies Like Us', which was a film starring Dan Aykroyd and Chevy Chase. Chase and Status are both junglists, and both massive. Massive Attack are a trip-hop outfit from Bristol, and Bristol is somewhere that's had its fair share of rain in the last 24 hours, and if it was colder the rain would probably turn to snow, which links to Snow and 'Informer'.

Flaws:

Seamless link today.

Tedious Facts:

Released - March 1993

Highest UK Chart Position - #2

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By Nicola_Red
#435949
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Today's Tedious Link:

Zoe, Sunshine On A Rainy Day

Today's Transcript:

Snow is what falls a lot in cold mountainous areas, and is a crucial ingredient in the sport of skiing. Skiing is what the Royal Family like to do in places like Switzerland and Austria. Switzerland and Austria were the host countries for the last European Football Championships, which were held last year. 'Year' rhymes with 'rear', as in 'Rear of the Year', which is an award that has been won by our producer Mr Aled Hadyn Jones. Jones, first name Tom, is a famous singer from Wales, who has collaborated during his long career with everyone from the Art of Noise to Mousse-T and the Sterophonics. Sterophonics frontman Kelly Jones supports Leeds United, who won again last night and are still six points clear at the top of League One. 'One' is the title of a beautiful record by U2, who are from the city of Dublin, like Jon and Edward. The name 'Edward' begins with the letter 'E', which is only two letters away from the letter 'J', which is the starting point for names such as 'Jerome' and 'Jeffrey'. Geoffrey was the name of a famous character from the old kids' show 'Rainbow', and a rainbow occurs when you get sunshine on a rainy day, which links to Zoe and 'Sunshine On A Rainy Day'.

Flaws:

As many texters pointed out, 'J' is not two letters away from 'E', it's five...

Tedious Facts:

Released - August 1991

Highest UK Chart Position - #4

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By Nicola_Red
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Today's Tedious Link:

Jamiroquai, Little L

Today's Transcript:

Zoe is one of those names that's probably at the end of your phone book, along with Zara and Zac. Zac Efron was in Radio 1 the other day, and had a little chat with Greg James. Greg James is very tall, and in that respect shares something in common with Frank Bruno. Frank Bruno shares one name in common with Bruno Tonioli, who does 'Strictly Come Dancing' with the legend that is Len Goodman. Len Goodman supports West Ham, like Kris Akabusi and Smithy from 'Gavin & Stacey'. Smithy from 'Gavin & Stacey' is played by James Corden, who's here right now with his co-star and co-writer Ruth Jones, to plug the fact that 'Gavin & Stacey' series 3 starts tonight on BBC1. 'Tonight Tonight' was a big hit in 1996 for the Smashing Pumpkins. Smashing pumpkins is what Sam Fox was famous for before she went into the celebrity jungle. The Jungle Book was originally written years ago by Rudyard Kipling, who's no relation to the other Mr Kipling, who makes cakes. The middle letter of 'cakes' is 'K', which is also the surname of Jay Kay from Jamiroquai, which links to Jamiroquai and 'Little L'.

Flaws:

A few technicalities to iron out today. Zoe, Zara and Zac might be at the end of many people's phonebooks on their mobiles, but they wouldn't be at the end of those of conventionalists or of a traditional written phonebook, as those are ordered by surname, not first name. Sam Fox might be best known for her assets that landed her a career on Page 3, but she wasn't famous solely for that before entering the jungle, as she's had a successful singing career, done TV presenting work and appeared on other reality shows. And 'K' as in the middle letter in the word 'cakes' isn't the same thing as the word 'Kay', and so isn't actually Jay Kay's surname.

Tedious Facts:

Released - August 2001

Highest UK Chart Position - #5

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By Nicola_Red
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Today's Tedious Link:

Metallica, Enter Sandman

Today's Transcript:

Jamiroquai's Jay Kay is a massive petrolhead, and even has his own helicopter to accompany his impressive fleet of vehicles. 'Vehicles And Animals' was the title of the debut album by Athlete, which spawned the hits 'You Got The Style' and 'El Salvador'. El Salvador is in Central America, and is not that far from Mexico, where they like to eat spicy food, so perhaps not a good idea if you don't like chili peppers that are red hot. The Red Hot Chili Peppers are a band from California whose lead singer is called Anthony Kiedis and whose bass player is called Flea. Flee is what you should do if you have to escape a building that's burning. 'Burning' is a word that you'd associate with the one and only Sean Paul. Sean Paul is from Jamaica, which is an island in the Caribbean. The Caribbean is somewhere that used to be plagued with pirates, as depicted in the film 'Pirates of the Caribbean', starring Johnny Depp. Johnny Depp is the life partner of Vanessa Paradis, who's French. The French have different words for all sorts of things, such as 'dormier', which means 'to sleep'. Sleep is what you'd be getting if you were dreaming, and in a state where you'd be thinking about the sandman, which links to Metallica and 'Enter Sandman'.

Flaws:

Not a flaw as such, but French people do tend to have different words for all sorts of things, as it's a completely different language...

Tedious Facts:

Released - August 1991

Highest UK Chart Position - #5

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By Nicola_Red
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Today's Tedious Link:

The Streets, Don't Mug Yourself

Today's Transcript:

The drummer of Metallica is a man called Lars Ulrich, who's Danish, a bit like the pastries. Danish pastries are the sort of thing you might find on a continental buffet. The word 'buffet' is the same in French and English, and basically means a table or counter where refreshments are served. 'Served' is the past tense of the verb 'to serve', which is something that Andy Murray does when he's playing tennis. Tennis is what's known as a racquet sport, along with things like badminton and squash. Squash of a different type is what you mix with water to create a fruit flavoured drink which is also sometimes known as cordial. 'Cordial' also means sincere and warm and friendly. Friendly Fires are a band from Rock City, St Albans, which is somewhere the Romans liked to live when they were over here years ago. 'Ago' is an anagram of 'Goa', which is a place in India popular with hippies. Hippies as a general rule have long hair, unlike someone like Mike Skinner from The Streets, who has short hair, which links to The Streets and 'Don't Mug Yourself'.

Flaws:

Seamless today.

Tedious Facts:

Released - November 2002

Highest UK Chart Position - #21

Dave's second choice from The Streets in two weeks - he linked to 'Dry Your Eyes' on 16th November.

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By Nicola_Red
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Today's Tedious Link:

The Clash, London Calling

Today's Transcript:

The streets are what you get a lot of in cities, as opposed to little lanes, which are what you get in the country. 'Country House' was a big hit in 1995 for Blur, and was the track that kept 'Roll With It' by Oasis off the top spot. The plural of 'spot' is 'spots', which you get a lot of all over your body if you get chickenpox. 'Pox' rhymes with 'box', which is what you might keep stuff in, but is also a vital piece of equipment in the sport of gymnastics. Gymnastics is an activity that involves the wearing of a leotard. If you swap the 'T' in 'leotard' for a 'P' you get 'leopard', which is a type of big cat that you might find in the wild. The word 'wild' is a word that can precede 'parties', 'fire' and 'rice'. Rice is produced on a large scale in many areas of the world, and in Asia is grown in a wet field called a paddy. Paddy McGuinness is a mate of Peter Kay, and starred alongside him in the classic comedy 'Phoenix Nights'. Knights of a different type were popular in the olden days, when they used to wear suits of armour. If two knights were doing a joust on horseback and they ran into each other it might be described as a 'clash', which links to The Clash and 'London Calling'.

Flaws:

Another watertight link.

Tedious Facts:

Released - December 1979

Highest UK Chart Position - #11

This track is Dave's oldest choice this year, predating August's Van Halen link by a good five years.

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Today's Tedious Link:

Daft Punk, Digital Love

Today's Transcript:

If you take the 'L' out of the word 'clash' you get 'cash', which is what you get from a hole in the wall. 'Hole In The Wall' is the name of a massive BBC1 Saturday night show, which gets big celebrity names on every week. Weak is the opposite of strong, which is how I like my tea. 'Mighty' is a word that often precedes 'high', which is the name of a beautiful early record from Feeder. A feeder at the zoo ensures all the animals get their lunch. 'Lunch' rhymes with 'hunch', which is something a detective might get if he's onto something. 'Something For The Weekend' is presented by Tim Lovejoy, Amanda Hamilton and chef Simon Rimmer. 'Rimmer' rhymes with 'dimmer', which is a type of switch you might have on your lights. Lights and reflective clothing are crucial for road safety if you're cycling at night. 'At Night' was a 2002 hit for Shakedown. Shake down and bake down is what we hoped to do to Jake Humphrey yesterday at the go-karting, although technically he was a bit too good. The word 'good' is translated as 'bon' in French, and French is the nationality of Daft Punk, which links to Daft Punk and 'Digital Love'.

Flaws:

The word 'mighty' doesn't usually precede high but follows it, as in the phrase 'high and mighty'.

Tedious Facts:

Released - June 2001

Highest UK Chart Position - #14

Dave last linked to this track just seven months ago.

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By Nicola_Red
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Today's Tedious Link:

The Chemical Brothers, It Began In Afrika

Today's Transcript:

Daft Punk are made up of two boys called Guy-Manuel and Thomas, who are both from Paris. As well as being the capital of France, Paris is also the first name of Paris Hilton, who was recently interviewed on the telly by our very own Fearne Cotton. Cotton used to be spun in mills in places like Lancashire, where the air is naturally quite damp. Damp is what you don't want in your house, as it can lead to things like mould and mushrooms growing on your walls. Walls are a crucial ingredient in the sport of squash, which is a game involving two players, two racquets and one very squashy ball. Ball, first name Zoe, is the wife of Norman Cook, aka Fatboy Slim. 'Slim' rhymes with 'Kim', as in Kim Jong-Il, who's the supreme leader of Korea DPR, who have ended up in the World Cup 'Group of Death' along with Brazil, Portugal and the Ivory Coast. The Ivory Coast is where Didier Drogba is from, who plays his club football for Chelsea. Chelsea are managed by Carlo Ancelotti, who's Italian like Gino D'Acampo. Gino D'Acampo was crowned King of the jungle on Friday, which is the day that Chris and Aled flew back to the UK on a flight that began in Africa, which links to The Chemical Brothers and 'It Began In Afrika'.

Flaws:

Watertight today.

Tedious Facts:

Released - September 2001

Highest UK Chart Position - #8

Dave is a big Chemical Brothers fan - this is his fourth link to one of their tracks this year (following Setting Sun in April, Star Guitar in June and Let Forever Be in September).

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