The chrismoyles.net TV & Radio Show Reviews
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By Chris
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Kasabian- Club Foot; NEWSBEAT; Black Eyed Peas- Don't Phunk With My Heart; Natalie Imbruglia- Torn; Razorlight- Somewhere Else; Usher- Yeah; NEWSBEAT; Athlete- Half Light; Studio B- I See Girls; The Bravery- Fearless; NEWSBEAT; Gwen Stefani- Hollaback Girl; Phantom Planet- California; Snoop Dogg feat. Justin Timberlake- Signs; Ceasers- Jerk It Out; NEWSBEAT; Gorillaz- Feel Good Inc; White Stripes- Black Orchid; Kaiser Chiefs- Everyday I Love You Less And Less; TEDIOUS LINK; Destiny's Child- Lose My Breath; The Futureheads- Decent Days And Nights; Bodyrockers- I Like The Way You Move; NEWSBEAT; Oasis- Lyla; Basement Jaxx- Good Luck; Jamiroqui- Feels Just Like It Should

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Hello and good morning from the Chris Moyles team, who today have made their merry way to Sunderland and the Stadium Of Light in honour of this weekend and the Radio 1's Big Weekend, broadcasting live from the place with, as Chris claims, the warmest seas in the world. We're all here, even Leslie! But Joce, bless her, is feeling a bit sick. Could she be...? (in case you were wondering, there was a pregnancy insinuation there).

Dom and Carrie aren't with them intially, and so after briefly skimming over what they got up to the night previously (not together)- mostly involving ironing, packing and bringing the wrong clothes for the weather on Dom's part, we're graced with Chris and Dave describing us the view from their makeshift studio. They should know, because they spent yesterday on the seafront, together, holding hands. Awww. It's all very school trip-esque, mixed with a touch of Friday happiness, and so the show seems to push along at a relaxed (maybe slightly too), colloquial pace. The place is pretty great we find out, but it's been left in the shadows by Chris- just like The Rasmus (drumroll mark one). Everyone's talking about the visit, yes they are- but they still couldn't stop it! (drumroll mark two).

Comedy Dave then proceeds to inform us of the history of the Staduim Of Light (albeit his patchy version), and we discover that the bar in which they're sitting has a bar counter just like the one in Cheers- square as a very square thing. Later on, when they leave the bar, Dave and Chris are going to go and practise some skills on the Staduim Of Light pitch- not ball skills, as you might think, but broadcasting skills, of course.

Carpark Bingo

As a bit of a change, the team decide to shun CPC for a bit of CPB- that's Carpark Bingo to you and me. After rattling through various possible prizes, including Aled and stolen memoribilia from the SOL, it's decided the victor will win a cup of tea. Or coffee. Made by Rachel, nonetheless. Which means made by Joce. Apart from the sprawling carpark outside, there's someone mowing the lawn, Dvae notes. It's not a lawn, Chris argues, it's a pitch- it's not bowls, for goodness' sake. Bowls to you Dave, anyway.

Sunderland Pub Quiz

So, to the pub quiz tonight at the Bondage Club (or Bonded Warehouse, Sunderland's student union). Aled and Rachel have already got their outfits, because a bit of bondage never went amiss, did it. After a stern warning to not bother turning up unless you have tickets- because we're all that stupid- Dave tells us we can listen on 97-99FM on any good radio. Well done, Dave.

Football Ticket Giveaway

As per usual just like any other Friday, there's tickets to be won to the football, only today of course it is Sunderland themed and so the teams in question are Sunderland v Stoke, for the game on Sunday (assuming you're not at R1BW). Just answer the phone with 'Champions!' and you're away. Easy as that. The tickets were won by John from Sunderland, so well done to him!

After Newsbeat some chat with Dom and Carrie ensues, as the two are still broadcasting live from London. Talk turns to football and, a lot of screaming and unfortunate use of the word 'rad', Carrie's sat there with none other than the Premiership (I think) trophe, adorned with blue ribbons, and guarded by a nice (but scary) man called Terry, complete with white gloves (he sleeps with that trophe every night- kinky). Carrie's gone purple, but at least she's seem the trophe before John Terry (no relation to nice but scary Terry). A lovely surprise for a Friday morning.

Dave's having a chat with Leslie and Claire, but he wasn't trying to get tickets to the Everton v Sunderland match, no way- he was saving that for after 9. But that's been spoilt by Chris, who's nursing an ulcer in his mouth- he should get some Bon Jovi cream. After this scintilating exchange, another mention goes to R1BW, as Aled's sent to somewhere in Sunderland to give away the last pair of tickets, VIP tickets at that!

Back to CPB, and so far the turn out is disappointingly poor. Only two cars, one red, one blue, in spaces 69 and 73. Whatsmore, it's a girl in space 69- typical Sunderland girl, he declares, alienating the entire female population of the city he's spending the weekend in. He hopes more people will turn up, but don't rush, remember to drive safely, says Rachel. Besides, Chris wouldn't want anyone to crash and die, as the listeners would end up going down. Good mornin'. Soon another one arrives, securing space 26, and hot on it's heels is a car transporter- genius idea. But Miss 69 is victorious in the end, winning a much coveted cup of tea.

Michael Bridges, of Sunderland FC fame pops in for a chat next. Topics covered include the Man U DVD he gave- it was a just meant as a gesture, to which Chris replies with a visual gesture of his own (great radio gag, I'm sure), Michael's continuing injuries (cue jokes about someone called Deano) and the upcoming victory parade in and around Sunderland in honour of their promotion. He then invites Chris and Dave to train with him later on, and taste some of the lovely food prepared for them by the in-house chef, to which they accept. Well, they'll at least go and watch. Seems only fair.

The range of people playing the fantastic new CPB game include J Dodds fencing, Kone, and many man white vans, who are all waiting for tea- they'll be lucky. So if you're waiting for some fencing this morning, missus, you'll be waiting a long time. the subsequent winner of this round is number 85, who wins along with the obligatory tea/coffee a Sunderland shirt, signed by all of the team players, including Deano, who may need a little help with writing. We really hope he's not listening at this point, or Chris is in for a battering.

R1BW Ticket Giveaway

After various plugs for the upcoming R1BW ("JK and Joel could do it!" on hearing Dave Grohl will be unable to do a planned accoustic set in the star bar) it's back to Aled who, after taking us on a short jaunt, arrives at the winner's house to find no one home! Great radio. They won't put the tickets through the letterbox, no they won't- stuff 'em. So they leave a note, just to let the poor missing fool realise what they're...well, missing out on. Later on the tickets are presented to a very excited Charlotte (well done to her), but not before Aled is berated for being an idiot boy and choosing an empty house.

After a seamless Tedious Link ("Just enjoy the treasure hunt music,") and a chat about little Jake who's been kicking a ball against the railings since they got there even though he should be in school (tut tut) and his fit mum, it's time for more CPB. This winner is inevitably number 59, and J. Dodds fencing- they're probably going to lose their jobs after this, but at least they've won a cuppa! And a bottle of water. Maybe a Sunderland shirt, stolen from the bar? And possibily a turnstyle, thrown in just for good measure. After some chat about Savaloy dips and pies to kick start the weekend, we find out there's no CPC today, due to CPB. Inevitable, really, and we learn we have one more game to go before the show's end, so Joce, get that kettle on- maybe Geoff, the mad Sunderland fan who's in the carpark with his huskies Leo and Safie will win.

After the show, Dom and Carrie will be travelling up to Sunderland for tonight's pub quiz, and so naturally Dom will be having a Guinness or two on the train. 3 and a half hours of pure hell- worse than listening to JK and Joel- hi lads, by the way, if you're listening. Love you really. After one more victorious car (number 24) recieves it's tea, that's the end of CPB and Joce's hot drink-making skills (make of that what you will).

Chris & Dave play footie

Chris and Dave decide to do something (no, not that) in the Sunderland tunnel later on in the show, and so after Newsbeat they take the opportunity to run, just like footie pro's, onto the pitch- despite Chris' glaring inability to actually even kick a football. But we can all dream. Later on, they play a little one-on-one footie with Dave the successor. Dave takes a victory run around the pitch, because he scores a fantastic goal, despite no one being there to see it- he's only acting out his childhood fantasy after all, so who can blame him! Well....despite this great interlude which works perfectly on radio, time's run out and it's time to leave, so we hope everyone has a good weekend and see you at the pub quiz if you're going- only if you've got a ticket, mind. Like we'd forget. So it's off to the Bondage Warehouse and then Penshaw Monument!

In Addition......

The clouds in Sunderland are red and white striped- honest
Ludacris is really from Huddersfield- again, honest
Dave also saw John Moss in a pub. Fact
Chris was given a chew to keep his gob shut, no doubt
The election's over- Howard Donald, Gordon Exchequer and Norman Lamont of Mowtown fame among other things
Lady drivers- don't flash your breasts! Or send photos of them
I like the way you, scratch your ass, beep your horn....can't be arsed
Carrie's ping pong ball trick- no wait, it's Dom's- rad

Small editing gap to come